Note: If I’ve forgotten anything, please tell me/put it in the comments section so I will remember to put it in later

Day 1
I learned a lesson every day on schoolies, and day one was no exception. Paul decided he was hungry,so we pulled into a place with various fast food outlets for a quick bite to eat. I ate at KFC, where the service was terrible(Lesson one: expect bad service when all the good service people have gone away to drink for a week..), whilst Jo and the troops headed to the old favourite, McDonalds. We had been craving HJ’s, but when settling for an alternative, we found it wasn’t so bad.

Upon Arrival at the Diamond Beach Resort, our home for the next week, we found it was nice, quiet, and we had to pay a FREAKING $100 BOND…EACH!!! Luckily we figured it out, and I learned Lesson Two: Always read the terms and conditions C A R E F U L L Y. That night we settled in, had a few drinks, went to sizzler, came home, found that lance was a suprisingly easy drunk and that it was easier than we thought to convince him that he was actually a mermaid- with the help of his phone. Lance’s phone kept us quite entertained all week, as his “desktop” image is his name, scrawled. The location (in this case, mermaid beach, shortened to mermaid to fit on his screen) was displayed above his name, thus having the ‘desktop’ of his phone reading “mermaid lance”. After we played the ‘who can sit down the longest (and avoid breaking the glass top tables the hotel had)’ , Lance discovered his phone, and Joanne and I convinced him that the print on his jumper was actually mermaid scales. Later that night we took the boys to the beach, Lance nearly ran away, and Russell was under the impression that a dog had driven the car that had left the tracks on the beach.

Day 2
The morning of Day 2, we decided to tackle the overcast weather and brave the walk to Cavil along the beach front. Lesson 3: Do not, by any means, walk down the beach in windy, cold, overcast weather unless you are being chased by a pack of ravenous, rabid mixtures of dingo, wolf and dinosaur. Resulting wind and sandburn is not comfortable for the remainder of the week. It started raining a little too hard, and got a little too windy, so we decided to walk down the road instead, which was slightly more comfortable. In keeping with murphy’s law, the minute we walked down the road the rain stopped, but we decided not to tempt fate, and continued along the dry, windless road. Upon arrival in Cavill we registered as official schoolies and were given swooby wrist band things, and immersed ourselves in food, DDR (well, lance and russ did..), and plenty of shopping. Because, as musicians (mostly), we were too lazy to walk home, we caught a bus. I was then able to test out my new boardies in the spa and pool, and tinker with the recently bought rubiks cube (that I’ve now almost mastered.. go team rubiks..).
That night was fairly tame, we didn’t actually do very much. I think Jo, India and Paulous went to the casino (correct me if I’m wrong please ) and we sat at home watching dvd’s.

Day 3
I don’t actually remember much about the daytime of day 3, but I remember we went to Cavill that night, using the free ‘free2go’ bus thing. Lance, being the cadbury of the group, was again fairly drunk, and we met a really nice lady at the bus stop who worked at the casino. Once on the bus, however, some students from UQ gave us some survey/questionaire things to fill out, which didn’t go well with drunken lance, who didn’t quite understand the questions and ticked the boxes that indicated that he had tried pretty much every drug available on the coast to schoolies (which was, of course, incorrect). Two stops later, our first experience with the gold coast skanks began. I began wishing for a tranquiliser gun of some description so I could put them (or myself, depending on the number of tranquiliser darts I actually had) out of their misery. However, once again, Lance’s phone proved itself to be a greater source of entertainment than we had ever expected, when we pulled onto Hooker St. As you can imagine, the word Hooker was displayed above Lance’s name, which was followed by him exclaiming, a little loudly:
“My phone says I’m a hooker, am I a fucking hooker?”

Over and over again, sometimes with variation of the words. When the bus drove down the esplanade, Lance read it as ‘es-plan-de’, which is, if you pronounce it with a mexican accent, quite amusing. I’ll have to record it as a sound file and put it on here somewhere so you can listen to it for yourselves. Coming from a drunk man, it’s pure gold.

Upon arrival at schoolies central, Joanne and I headed down to the beach, the boys headed down Cavill Av, and I bumped into a friend from primary school, Matthew Leasegang. Matthew used to be tiny, scrawny even, and would be kicked in the testicles every day without fail, mostly by this kid called Travis. Matthew was a lot friendlier on the beach (possibly due to the large amount of alcohol he had consumed), and was a hell of a lot taller than I remembered.

Joanne and I headed into the mosh pit, were groped by these tall, drunken people, and Joanne’s feet were stood on, so we made our way out and stood on the beach again, where we were approached by two guys, one fairly good looking, one who wasn’t quite as blessed. The cute one identified himself as eugene (we later discovered his name was matt), and the other was ryan (could’ve been brian, I’m not sure). Anyways, they asked Jo and I to kiss them on the cheek. Being the friendly young lasses we are, we obliged. After that they kind of wandered away and met up with their friends. We met up with Russ, Lance and Ralph again, and headed home. Unfortunately, on the bus, we found ‘Eugene’ and B/ryan. After spotting them, all four of us averted our eyes for the rest of the trip, and Eugene wasn’t as cute as we had remembered. Lesson 4- Beach lighting just isn’t adequate. Lesson 5- Before doing something you might find embarassing in normal circumstances, think about how you’re getting home..

Days 4-7 will be added later today, along with anything i’ve forgotten.

Sit tight possums